Thong song
April 11, 2006, 5:23 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

I am adhering to my vow to openly discuss any topic with Loren. It has not yet completely bitten me in the butt, though I am sure someday it likely will. My hope is not that he will come out of this thinking I am such a cool mom, but rather I don’t want him to be afraid to confide in me, make bad choices and then have something horrible happen to him or one of his friends. Nor am I thinking that I can be the saviour of his teenage years. I just want him to survive them with all his brain functions and limbs intact. My hope is that by keeping an open channel this might help to facilitate his survival.

Tonight after I picked up Loren from Religious Ed class, an educational endeavor he hates, he was yabbering on and on about this and that. We stopped by our townhome to pick up some of his essentials to take to my mother’s house while we housesit for her. I was checking my email and he came out of the bathroom prancing about and tugging on his pants. I raised an eyebrow to him, and he replied,”Man, don’t go in there! Whew, damn, now I’ve got the butt munchies. I hate it when I get the butt munchies!”

To which I said, “Well, perhaps if you first pulled up your boxers and then your jeans, you would have a cleaner clothing line, thus avoiding undergarment discomfort.”

He sighed, “Man, Mom, no time for that. Anyway, you don’t know how good you’ve got it. Girls don’t have to worry about the butt munchies.”

So I countered, “Ah there you have it so wrong, my friend. A thong gone wrong is like no other irritation you will ever experience.”

“Okay, you got me there. And I really don’t want to go there.”

I think saw him shake off the Willies as we left the house and climbed into the car.


2 Comments so far
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butt munchies? not sure if my kids know that one. they call it, what do they call it? wedgies, for one thing. I’ll have to ask them if they know butt munchies.

Comment by inkstains

A thong gone wrong is also known as BUTT FLOSS.

Comment by L.

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