Christmas Truths
December 22, 2005, 9:37 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I am a Christmas loser. It’s true. Every year in about October, I have the grandest of plans. I see the children and myself baking gingerbread men and cheerfully delivering them to friends and neighbors. In my head I concoct elaborate Advent calenders, with a different treat in each pocket-day of the month. In July I honestly believe that by September’s end I will have ALL my shopping completed, stocking stuffers and all. I always design and paint a Christmas card and, in my head, decide to mail one to every person I have ever known or encountered. These are always my bestest of intentions. Too fucking bad I always get in the way on my inner Martha Stewart.

Reality is always a bit different than one’s intentions. Truth is if we end up baking, the Pilsbury doughboy is our inspiration. This year I didn’t even buy an Advent calendar. It is December 22, and not only have I not bought or made a single present for any friend or relative, I am not sure I have finished the childrens’ shopping. This year I did design and paint a card, but it ended up as my current masthead. I figure if my true friends are clever enough to find my blog, well then merry, merry.

December 25 will come whether or not I have met with the holiday expectations. Tonight Matt and I bought a ferret for Cassidy and her broken heart. Did we not just kill off our guinea pig? Yes, indeed. But I have high hopes for this ferret. We got a cage, food, a hammock. The works. If we can keep it a secret and alive, for two more days, we are Golden. I have special ordered Loren’s snow skate and am praying it will arrive by Saturday. We popped a Nerf football in the basket for Devon, plus a handfull of plastic jungle animals. He is just happy when we turn on the Christmas lights, so I think we’re good with him. As for the other things? No, not gonna get cards mailed. Missed the deadline to get packages deilvered. But at this point it is what it is.

Deep down, I know that by July, I will again have dreams of Christmas grandeur. I will envision a Martha Perfect holiday. And I will know that I am just the Martha to create that perfection.


2 Comments so far
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I am so excited about the ferret. I liked your ferrets.

This year, my Christmas dreams have been turned on their ass too, and thank god for Pilsbury is all I have to say.

Comment by jen-o-rama

The ferret is really cool!! I was able to bake for Christmas, but I dont know how long that will last when kids come!!

Comment by greensunflower

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