Caloden


Here and Now
December 3, 2005, 10:10 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

Tonight I went to pick Loren up at a friend’s house and ended up chatting with his friend’s mom for over an hour. I am not usually a casual chatterer since I often have Devon and am mostly interested in preventing the destruction of our surroundings due to his curiousity. But tonight Devon was home in bed and so I sat with my friend and caught up on her life. She is an amazing woman. Her husband left about nine years ago and he has never contacted them again, since then she has supported four children without any help from him. Several years ago she was diagnosed with MS and this summer she left her job and is on permanent disability. She talked about how this is the first time in her life she hasn’t had a job, hasn’t had to think about getting a job or stress that she has no future plans of ever getting a job. She said it is a huge adjustment to have the luxury of embracing her full time role as a mother. She said that even though on some days she can barely walk, she is happier than she has ever been because she can take her kids to school and be there when they get home. We both had a laugh at the irony of it all.

I have another friend who has a genetic liver disease and has virtually no immune system. Her lungs are scarred from so much pneumonia and some days it is hard for her to catch a breath. Last January she almost died when she caught a cold that quickly went to her lungs and roosted on her scar tissue. In fact, about once a year she nearly dies from sort of bronchial battle. But in between those times, she stomps through the days and spends most every moment she can with her son. She was told she could never have children, and so the fact that she was able to birth him and live through it is a miracle. She holds that close to her soul and gives thanks every day. It is her goal to live long enough to see her son graduate from highschool. I want her around much longer so I have asked her to be Devon’s godmother so that she’ll have to continue stomping about.

Both of these women are a miracle of strength to me. I sometimes look at them and wonder what I possibly can bitch about. I think it is true that we all carry only that which we can, but in some cases the load seems so much heavier. Some days, when my load seems crippling, I think of these two women and it motivates me to get up off of my ass, give thanks for what I have and to get on with things. Because as they have both told me time and again: life is short, make the most of today.

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